By Thomas Danjuma Abu
There was a time when raising a child was never the responsibility of parents alone. It was a shared responsibility. Parents, neighbours, teachers, religious leaders, and the entire community played a role in shaping a child's character. Every responsible adult felt a duty to guide, correct, and protect every child.
I still remember those days. If your parents travelled or were not at home, your neighbour naturally looked out for you. If you misbehaved, that neighbour corrected you—not because they hated you, but because they wanted you to become a responsible adult. When your parents returned, they thanked the neighbour instead of picking a fight. Everyone understood that a child belonged to the community as much as to the family.
A child raised by a community grows with discipline; a child abandoned to the internet grows with confusion.
Sadly, things have changed. Today, many parents no longer want anyone correcting their children. At the same time, many neighbours are afraid to intervene because they fear being insulted, misunderstood, or even attacked. The result is that many children now receive more guidance from social media, celebrities, and their peers than from parents or other responsible adults. We should not be surprised by the consequences.
I woke up one morning to a video in which social media personality VeryDarkMan (VDM) expressed concern over a little girl who appeared to be less than six years old. In the video, the child was dancing in a sexually suggestive manner and shaking her buttocks while her mother stood beside her. Beyond the video itself, what deeply disturbed me was not only the child's behaviour, but also the presence of the very person who should have been protecting her innocence. I immediately asked myself: If those entrusted with shaping a child's character fail in that responsibility, who will?
Children are not born with such behaviours. They learn from what they repeatedly watch, hear, celebrate, and imitate. If a child who is barely six years old is already displaying behaviour that should concern responsible adults, then society must pause and ask difficult questions. What is she watching? What is she being taught? Who is influencing her? More importantly, where are the parents, the neighbours, the teachers, the religious leaders, and the community?
When responsible adults become silent, irresponsible influences become the loudest teachers.
That video reminded me that character cannot be built overnight. It starts at home, is strengthened in school, reinforced in places of worship, and protected by the community. If we neglect these foundations, we should not be surprised when society begins to reap the consequences.
The behavioural problems we complain about today—internet fraud, corruption, cultism, drug abuse, kidnapping, cybercrime, examination malpractice, and human trafficking—did not begin when these individuals became adults. They started much earlier, when wrong values were tolerated and right values were neglected.
Every criminal was once a child. The difference is who shaped that child's conscience.
Because we have neglected early character formation, governments now spend enormous resources dealing with the consequences. Agencies such as the EFCC, ICPC, NAPTIP, the NFIU, the courts, and correctional centres continue to battle crimes that could have been prevented through proper moral education. These institutions are doing important work, but we must ask ourselves an uncomfortable question: Are we investing enough in preventing crime before it begins?
My conviction that we are not doing enough was strengthened by a personal experience.
Some time ago, I met four teenagers and asked them a simple question: "Is internet fraud wrong?"
To my surprise, all four answered, "No."
I asked one of them why.
Without hesitation, he replied, "If I make the money, I will use it to build a house for my parents."
His answer broke my heart.
Here was a young person with a good dream but a dangerous understanding of how to achieve it. Building a house for one's parents is a noble ambition, but stealing, deceiving, or defrauding others to achieve that dream can never be justified.
A noble destination can never justify a corrupt journey.
The moment children begin to believe that the end justifies the means, society has already begun producing tomorrow's criminals.
Crime is first committed in the mind before it is committed with the hands.
This is why our response to crime must change. We cannot continue waiting until people become hardened criminals before trying to reform them. Arrests, prosecutions, convictions, and imprisonment are necessary, but they should never become our primary strategy.
It is cheaper to build a child's character than to rebuild an adult's life.
This is why I respectfully appeal to agencies such as the EFCC, ICPC, NAPTIP, and the NFIU to work more closely with families, religious institutions, and primary and secondary schools. Beyond enforcement, these agencies should invest in prevention by promoting integrity, honesty, digital responsibility, patriotism, and responsible citizenship among children and teenagers.
Imagine every primary and secondary school having Integrity Ambassadors—young people trained to promote honesty, accountability, respect, discipline, and responsible citizenship among their peers. Imagine parents, teachers, religious leaders, neighbours, and communities speaking with one voice about character instead of leaving moral education to chance.
The strongest anti-corruption agency is not found in an office—it begins in the family.
No nation can successfully arrest its way out of moral decline. Courtrooms are important, but classrooms are even more important. Correctional centres are necessary, but families remain the first and most effective institutions for preventing crime.
We cannot continue producing children without producing character.
If we genuinely want a safer and more prosperous Nigeria, we must stop spending all our energy repairing broken adults while neglecting the children who will become tomorrow's leaders.
If we fail to teach values in our homes today, we will pay for prisons tomorrow.
The best crime prevention strategy does not begin in the courtroom or the correctional centre. It begins in the home, is nurtured in the classroom, reinforced in places of worship, and sustained by the community. Strong families, strong schools, strong communities, and sound moral education remain the most effective defence against crime.
The time to shape character is before temptation arrives—not after crime has already been committed.
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